Wednesday, March 11, 2009

3 Years in 30 Minutes or Less

It's time for Owen's tri-annual (that means every three years, right?) Special Education review...that's probably not the official name, but it's basically the school district saying, "Hey, it's been three years since we really looked at why we're giving this kid services, let's test him some more." They do annual IEP reviews already, plus we meet with all of his teachers at conferences, so I'm not totally sure what the purpose of this review is, but it seems reasonable to me that they would review his services and his educational diagnosis as he gets ready to become a (gasp) first grader next year.

As part of this review, I have to be interviewed by the school social worker about his development. According to said social worker, I'm supposed to tell her about his development over the last three years. So basically ever since he got diagnosed...I am feeling a bit overwhelmed by this, which maybe subconsciously is why I somehow keep scheduling this interview at bad times and then having to call and reschedule it. But I think it will happen today, finally. 

This gets at my issue with the fact that so much of the diagnosis and treatment of autism relies on the parents' ability to remember and articulate every development, delay, concern, and quirk. I'm not blaming anyone for this - it's simply where we are in our understanding of the autism spectrum - but, as the parent of a kid with autism, it's kind of a lot of pressure. 

Autism is part of our everyday lives. I don't consider it an everyday struggle because it's our "normal." We're used to it, we know how to work with it, we know how to help Owen avoid meltdowns or come out of them when they happen. We don't always like autism, but it's part of us in such a way that makes it difficult to stand back and analyze, or explain to someone else...especially someone who doesn't know us. 

So what if I don't mention something important because it doesn't seem like a big deal to me? What if I've forgotten yet another important milestone (seriously, with twins, it all becomes a blur). I think he's doing great. He is happy. He reads at a second grade level. He is funny. He is silly - sometimes too silly. Is there a special program to help him stop being too silly at school? 

I know they don't expect me to know what he needs, but I don't fully trust them to know either. I don't feel that the the special services he's been getting this year have made any difference (good or bad) for Owen. Does that mean he needs more services or less? I don't know. Should I go into this interview with an agenda one way or the other? Would it help me sort out everything I'm supposed to remember from the last 3 years?

As usual, I suppose all I can do is try my best and hope that it's enough. 

2 comments:

E Erickson said...

let me know if you find a way to tame the silliness at school, or otherwise. I could use less silliness at mealtimes...

Melanie said...

That would be tough. I was just telling the girls I work with it's difficult to do these interviews/assessments because what my son does just seems normal. I can't imagine trying to do 3 years all at once! Hope it went well.