Thank you, Easter Bunny

My children woke up at 5:45 this morning. They scampered into our bedroom around 6:15 a.m. This was the most excited they've ever been about Easter, and I wanted to share their enthusiasm...but not until 7 a.m.

After unsuccessfully attempting to make them "rest" in our bed for another half hour, we got up and the fun began. It started out as it always does: a plastic egg trail led them down the stairs and to their baskets. But then they realized there was more...the Easter bunny had hidden eggs in our backyard as well! 

Now, I use the term "hidden" very loosely here, as it was more like someone haphazardly dropped eggs within a 6 foot radius of the backdoor - in the dark - but you'd think we had taken them to the egg hunt on the White House lawn the way Aidan kept exclaiming, "This is a dream come true!" Owen, on the other hand, showed tremendous focus as he scrambled to get more eggs than his brother, all the while laughing maniacally. 

And now, having each consumed several pounds of chocolate, the boys are watching cartoons in their PJs while the blueberry muffins bake. And it's only 7:37 a.m. 

Happy Easter!

P.S. I recommend reading celebrity Aspergian John Robison's Look Me in the Eye blog for his explanation of egg-laying bunnies. 

On the Road Again

This morning will start with a stop at one of my favorite kid-friendly coffee places, Java Train, where I will indulge in a Cadbury Egg Mocha...will it be good? I have no idea, but I imagine that with the amount of sugar that must be in the thing and my love for Cadbury Eggs (when I was pregnant, I kept a gallon size ziploc bag of them in the freezer), it couldn't be terrible. 

After the coffee fun, I'm on the road again, headed back to Viroqua for what I hope (vow?) will be my last trip. While I'm road tripping through the less-than-scenic roads of southern Minnesota/western Wisconsin, I thought you all might enjoy some ideas for family activities this weekend (and Mama needs some clicks):

• This Saturday is the MN Rollergirls Season Championship! Is roller derby kid-friendly? Find out. 


• Perhaps you would enjoy a nature walk or a romp through a bog? Well, have I got a park for you. 


• Or maybe you'd like to go bowling this Sunday...no wait, you'll be hunting for eggs or stuffing your face with chocolate bunnies. But maybe you'd like to bookmark this handy list of breakfast and bowling options for next Sunday. 

If you decide to do any of these things, please go back and leave comments on the Examiner site!

And in autism-related news, it looks like more celebrities are stepping up to support Autism Speaks. It's always nice when celebrities use their influence to spotlight worthwhile causes...versus making it all about themselves and their convoluted theories, which actually work against the causes they claim to support. (You didn't think we'd get through the whole month without mentioning her, did you?) 

The Things We Do

I met with my former/soon-to-be new boss yesterday to go over the details of this fab new job (code name: Ticket to Hawaii), which starts a week from Monday. Then I worked at the bakery this morning, which made me realize that I might actually miss having a zero responsibility job. 

Rolling silverware, cleaning trays, making change...they all seem so straightforward and honest now that I'm once-again faced with having to strategize about enterprise solutions for achieving business objectives. I'm not complaining, I am merely admitting to a faint sense of panic at returning to the world of corporate propaganda. But I will kill the panic by reminding myself of all the lasting memories my family will create on Waikiki Beach — and the pina coladas, I'll think about those, too. 

In my more immediate future, I've got another trip down to Viroqua to think about. This time I'm dragging my husband along for manual labor. We've been together for 13 years and he's never met my grandmother — now he gets to help empty out her house. 

I don't really want to make this trip. I'm torn between feeling like I should do it and knowing that I shouldn't be doing things just because I think I should. Still, when you've got a family as tiny as mine, I guess the "shoulds" just win out. 

The thing is, being around crazy people can start to make you feel crazy. My grandmother is a bit nuts — that's the simplest explanation for why my mother (and subsequently, me) broke ties with her 20 years ago — and in the short time I spent down there with my mom and aunt last week, I started to see the nuttiness rubbing off on them, thus threatening my own sanity. It's bad enough that I know nuttiness runs in my genes...I'd like to save my own sanity for as long as possible. 

Plus, I don't want to leave the boys again and I can't bring them with. Aidan's allergies would make it impossible to have him in that house, nevermind the other factors making it a less-than-desirable place for children. 

So anyway, I'm going. Because I should. Because I make a good buffer between my aunt and my mother. Because I know my grandma will be happy to see me. Because it's not that much of my time and it will be over soon. Sigh.

Btw, it's still Autism Awareness Month and Team Owen has now raised $550! Thanks again to everyone who donated.

Also, the Chicago Tribune ran this article today, which touches on issues similar to what we're seeing (and anticipate seeing) with Owen in school. 

We're basically balancing our hopes between teaching him to learn to function in an environment designed for neurotypical children, and helping his teachers understand that usually all he needs is a little extra understanding (and maybe several more reminders than the other kids). He's high-functioning enough to be mainstreamed, but not neurotypical enough to excel in the existing constructs of public school. It just seems like we're all guessing here...I hope we can do better before he gets much older. 

For more information on autism, visit Autism Speaks. 

Action

Several weeks ago, my therapist gave me her theory on inertia, the gist being that you have to put something into action in order to make any of things you want to have happen, happen. Despite those two crazy boys running around, my life had come to a bit of a standstill.

So I got the bakery job. I needed a paycheck and I want to learn more about pastry, but more than anything, I needed to do something. Pretty much as soon as I started at the bakery, I had an awesome meeting with the cake lady, someone whom I still hope to work for someday soon. Then I got the job at Examiner.com. 

And then, last week, out of the blue, I got an offer from one of my favorite former bosses: a part-time job that pays a living wage. The only catch, of course, is that I must return to the corporate world, where I will write propaganda, attend meetings and probably wear heels. Can I do these things? Yes, yes, I can...especially if it means I'll be able to take my family on that Christmas trip to Hawaii we've been talking about for 6 months now. 

And so, with much glee, I put in my notice at the bakery. It was met with exactly the amount of apathy and annoyance as you would expect. And yes, knowing that I'm leaving does make pouring coffee and picking up other people's food messes somewhat easier. 

I am still hoping the cake job will work out. I would gladly work two part-time jobs if it meant I was paying the bills and getting a cakucation (that's cake + education). It's a pretty good alternative to sinking $20k into a pastry certificate that I'm still not sure I'd be able to use to earn a living. It at least buys me some more time to figure it out. 

Add in the writing gig, and I'm suddenly busy. And I'm not having a panic attack about it, which has to be a good sign. So, as usual, my therapist was right...a little action can make a lot happen. 

Speaking of action, I am proud to say that a benevolent friend pushed Team Owen over its goal yesterday! Which brings us to our Autism Awareness Month moment - once again taken from "Ten Things Every Child with Autism Wishes You Knew" by Ellen Notbohm:

My sensory perceptions are disordered.

This means that the ordinary sights, sounds, smells, tastes and touches of everyday that you may not even notice can be downright painful for me. The very environment in which I have to live often seems hostile. I may appear withdrawn or belligerent to you, but I am really just trying to defend myself. 

To learn more about autism, visit Autism Speaks. 

Expectations

Today I'd like to start by thanking those of you who donated to Team Owen. Your generosity is much appreciated and will come back to you in many ways. (Did that sound like a fortune cookie?)

We did not reach our goal of $500 by World Autism Awareness Day, however, we have raised $375 for Autism Speaks! We are also still accepting donations, so if you've been meaning to donate, there's still time.  

I returned safely from my trip to Wisconsin to see my ailing grandmother. I am happy to report that rumors of her being near death seem to have been exaggerated. I mean, I'm not a doctor, but the woman seemed more likely to walk out the front door and drive herself home than to kick the bucket. Still, she won't be living on her own again, so her house needs to be cleaned out and sold.

I'm happy to report that the condition of her house was somewhat exaggerated as well. I mean, it's pretty bad, but I was expecting something like those hoarders you see on Oprah. This was more like a quirky old woman with 8 pets who has collected a lifetime full of stuff and never cleaned. She apparently hoarded in drawers, not out in the open. Every single drawer in that house is packed with the most random artifacts from the last four decades...it's pretty interesting, once you get past the burning sensation in your eyes from all the animal urine. 

So anyway, I'll probably be making at least one more trip down there to help my mother and aunt get the house ready to sell, but assuming my grandmother lives, she will likely be moved to a home closer to us in the coming weeks. That means that after a 20-year break, I'll suddenly be seeing a lot more of her and my boys might actually get to meet their only living great-grandparent. Strange how things work out.

Since we're speaking of my grandmother, I think it's most appropriate that we spend today's Autism Awareness Month moment with an excerpt from "Ten Things Every Child with Autism Wishes You Knew" by Ellen Notbohm - a book that my grandmother actually sent to me when she heard about Owen's diagnoses. (She was a teacher back in her day.)

I am first and foremost a child. I have autism. I am not primarily "autistic."

My autism is only one aspect of my total character. It does not define me as a person. Are you a person with thoughts, feelings, and many talents, or are you individualized by one trait? Are you fat (overweight), myopic (wear glasses) or klutzy (uncoordinated, not good at sports)? There may be things that I see first when I meet you, but they are not necessarily what you are all about. 

As an adult, you have some control over how you define yourself. If you want to single out a single characteristic, you can make that known. As a child, I am still unfolding. Neither you nor I yet know what I may be capable of. Defining me by one characteristic runs the danger of setting up an expectation that may be too low. And if I get a sense that you don't think I "can do it," my natural response will be: Why try?

Here's to high expectations. Not just of our children, but of the doctors, scientists and lawmakers we're depending on, too. 

To learn more about autism, visit Autism Speaks. 

It's World Autism Awareness Day

Today is World Autism Awareness Day. What can you do to help spread awareness?

Here in the Twin Cities, families are rallying at the Capitol in support of several autism-related bills, including insurance reform and a bill that would establish a task force to limit the use of seclusion and restraints in the public school system - a practice I've mentioned before that scares the hell out of me. 

Sadly, I will not be attending any rallies today. Instead, I will be driving down to Viroqua, Wisc. with my mother, to say goodbye to my estranged grandmother, who just had a stroke, and begin the terrifying process of cleaning out her house...where she's lived alone for 15 years...collecting stray animals. I am shuddering at the thought. 

I will be back tomorrow and it would be such a nice surprise to find out that, in my absence, Team Owen met its goal. You can help! Thanks to everyone who has already donated - it's not too late for the rest of you. Don't make me pull out that Alicia Keys video again...wow, that thing made me cry.

Happy World Autism Awareness Day, everyone. Let's all try to help just one person learn one thing about autism today. For more information, visit Autism Speaks. 

Autism Awareness Month: Team Owen Returns

Happy Autism Awareness Month! 

Since it's day one, let's start with a basic definition of autism: 

Autism is a neurological disorder characterized by impaired social and communication skills. 

Often, people use the term "autism" when they are actually referring to "Autism Spectrum Disorder" (or ASD), a term that includes three neurological disorders: Asperger's syndrome, Autism and Pervasive Developmental Disorder Not Otherwise Specified (PDD-NOS). Autism is the core disorder on the spectrum, but the severity with which a person is affected by all of these disorders varies widely (thus, the term "spectrum"). If you want to read a more extensive definition, check out the Autism Society of America site. 

Alright, so what better way to kick off this month - and prepare for World Autism Awareness Day tomorrow - than to tell you about the triumphant return of Team Owen!

You might remember that last April, Team Owen raised a lot of money for Autism Speaks through the virtual Walk Now for Autism event. Well, we're back! This year, the walk has been branded by the good people at Nickelodeon and is therefore known as "Walk with Wubzy on the Web." (For those unfamiliar, "Wow! Wow! Wubzy!" is a show on Nick, Jr.) 

In celebration of World Autism Awareness Day, Team Owen is collecting online donations that will go to Autism Speaks. Our goal is to reach $500 by the end of day tomorrow. You can help us by visiting our team page and donating now. Either click "General Team Donation" or choose one of our names and donate on our page. Or, if you're feeling really ambitious, join our team and start soliciting donations yourself! 

We support Autism Speaks because they support autism advocacy, awareness, treatment and research. We want to find out what caused Owen's autism. We want to learn more about how to help him. We hope that someday there will be a cure. Until then, we will focus on raising awareness and finding ways to help him reach his potential in a world full of policies and processes created by people whose brains work differently than his. 

Giving money is a personal decision, so I'm not going to try to guilt you into it. Just know that your donation makes a difference. Not just to us, but to the millions of people who have autism or love someone who does. It matters.

I should also add that if just 19 of you give $25, we will meet our goal. That feels reasonable. 

Whether you give money or simply take the time to learn more about autism this month, you have my thanks in advance. We can make this world a better place for Owen and every child with autism. 

Visit Team Owen at: http://www.walknowforautism.org/waadwalk/teamowen