Staying Home

When I quit my corporate job two years ago to stay home with my boys, I got crazy with the scheduling. Either I was trying to mimic the insane schedule I had in the office or I was trying to ward off the feeling of restlessness that pretty much every stay-at-home mom feels, so I scheduled something for every day.

There were days when our schedule involved more than one playdate plus multiple errands…plus my then 2 ½ year-olds still had to nap at some point. It was exhausting and stupid. And I still felt restless, only I wasn’t sitting still.

As with most things I do, I gradually lost interest in scheduling. It was too hard and the sense of contentment that I thought would come from feeling like I was “making the most” of staying home with my kids never really revealed itself.

So then we moved into the sloth phase, where I hardly made any plans and we spent a lot of time sitting around. Or more accurately, I sat around and the boys played happily because, well, they actually like staying home. Not surprisingly, this phase didn’t suit me either...in fact, I found it to be somewhat more exhausting in a teetering-on-depression sort of way. Preschool did help this predicament by adding some structure and giving me “free” time for a couple hours, two days a week. (Hooray for preschool!)

Fueled by boredom and a sense of impending doom where my career was concerned, last fall I finally decided it was time to start easing back into the workplace…the one where you have to get dressed and stuff. My part-time schedule means I get to be home with my boys for two entire days during the week still. This means I can fill one day with errands and playdates and then plan nothing on the other. Because now that I have less time to do it, I actually like staying home and doing nothing…but only in single day increments.