Corporate Catharsis

A few weeks ago, I began what seems like a social experiment but is actually my job: I returned to my former corporate team as a consultant. I haven't mentioned it sooner because, well, I try not to comment much on work in this blog, but occasionally lines get crossed.

Now, I'm not back permanently, mind you, I'm just there to complete a project (using much of the expertise that I acquired there). But man, it's weird. I equate it to going back to high school as an adult. There's a familiar feeling of uncertainty and dread that comes with reentering the corporate whirlpool...

But here's the surprising part: It's not bad. I thought my post-traumatic stress would send me reeling upon re-entry, but instead it's kinda fun. It's not all fun, but it's fun to see my friends who are still there. It's fun to have coworkers who are actually sitting beside you (the downside of the home office). It's fun to be able to problem-solve in nearly real-time rather than feeling one or two steps removed from the solution.

More importantly, I feel like it's giving me a chance to make peace with a place that I associate with some of the hardest times of my life (I'm thinking specifically of my boys being in the hospital and my dad dying, but there was also that looming feeling that I was selling my soul). I don't know, it's like having lunch with an ex-boyfriend and realizing that you're actually happy that he's met someone else.

The point is, I'm finding it cathartic. And the work is actually interesting, a fact that got lost beneath the frenzy and politics when I actually worked there. Crazy.

Here's to finding healing in the most unlikely places.